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. she said she was sorry, for leaving like she did, but she didn't say why. And, she said she was good, she was happy. She didn't leave a return address... I still have the letter, though. You're welcome to read it."Eddie offering to let me read that letter only told me that he wasn't trying to hide anything. Which meant that he really hadn't known about me. I was slowly accepting that. But accepting it meant that the open, honest relationship that I thought I'd had with my mother wasn't so honest after all. And I was angry with her about that.I mean, telling my mom I was gay, was the hardest thing I ever had to do. It was the only secret I'd ever kept from her and in the end I came clean with it. Why wouldn't she tell me that my father didn't even know about me? I'd always assumed that he didn'twant to be there. And Mom not telling me... she'd let me believe that."I don't know why she would do it," I said, looking down. "It doesn't make sense. We didn't keep secrets from each other.". "The one who rode the cart, hit balls in the wrong fairway and drank a lot of beer?"She told me it was burned in her mind forever."It'll be just like that without the beer," I said. "Everyone here shoots in the 80s or better. Everyone but me. I'll still come along and carry your clubs. That way your dad will get a chance to play a little golf with his daughter."I also knew that if I played, someone who really wanted to play wouldn't get the chance. I figured I had a better than even shot of playing a few rounds of golf with Bailey before my life was over.I toted Bailey's bag for her and it was pretty fun. She didn't ask much about club selection, but I was good with yardage and I could help with the greens. Everyone had a great time, and after supper at the club, Bailey and I escaped into Lexington so I could show her a little about college life.It still was the last Saturday of Spring Break, but a few people had trickled back into town. Most were too poor or too sunburned to do.
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